Deepavali Festivities

For several days, every street corner was the scene of bombs blasting, crackers exploding, bottle-rockets whizzing, sparklers sizzling, and flower pots cascading, but now it has died down to a quiet buzz only heard in distant parts of the city when I stand on my rooftop.

Even though the bombs, crackers, bottle-rockets, sparklers and flowerpots are probably made by child labor and are extremely polluting, I lit my fair share over the last few days, admittedly with some guilt, but also a lot of excitement and adrenaline. Originally, Prev and I had plans to head out of town and explore Ooty, a Tamil Nadu hill station, but after the bus accident that didn’t sound like a very good idea, or very relaxing. Instead, I chilled in Chennai and I was invited to spend the Deepavali holiday with two families. And both homes ardently support celebrating deepavali with fireworks. But we also celebrated one of India’s biggest holidays by eating, sleeping, wearing new clothes, taking an oil bath (oil head massage), watching TV, and of course lighting more fireworks!




It was a relaxing and festive weekend! Lots of time at home watching episodes of ‘Friends’ and ‘The Office’ balanced with family festive time. I also managed to get our new futon, buy a cover for it and cook a few tasty meals too!

Urging Fellows NOT To Take Night Buses

I’ve been trying to visit Madurai, my ‘native place’ in India since I arrived. It hasn’t worked out for lots of reasons, but last weekend I was finally able to book bus tickets. I actually hate taking overnight buses and avoid them whenever possible. Only under very unusual circumstances would I ever consider taking a bus between Madurai and Chennai (10-12 hrs!), but given the upcoming holidays all the trains were booked. It was either now, or wait until November. So I booked an overnight sleeper (full bed) on the way and a semi-sleeper (reclining seats) for the return.

Sadly the excitement and anticipation of my weekend trip to Madurai to visit friends and family was quickly dashed at 6am on Saturday morning when my bus crashed into a Toyota Qualis carrying young men to a DMDK (political party) rally in Chennai. A few people in my bus were injured, but five people in the vehicle were killed. They were all my age.

The front of my bus, notice the windshield fell out.

The back of my bus off the road! Thank god we didn't land on our
side or continue down the ravine.

The Toyota Qualis totally unidentifiable. This pictures has been cropped
to remove gruesome details.

I was sleeping when we hit them and went off the road. I realize I had nothing to do with the accident and I am not at fault (although my bus driver was arrested and was driving on the wrong side of the road). But the fact remains that I was in a vehicle, which was responsible for taking 5 lives. The accident could have been much worse for our vehicle, but luckily it wasn’t. I feel very lucky to be alive, and to be physically fine. But five others young people were not so lucky. There are families, wives, children, and friends that are grieving for them.

The typically Indian response is to ‘move on’, ‘it happens’ or ‘deal with it’. And those kinds of responses drive me mad. I realize those are the things I need to do…and I will do them. But I’m trying to figure out exactly HOW to do that…HOW to honor and remember lives lost. HOW to process my own feelings about being at the scene of a deadly accident. And HOW to make sure I’m not sweeping it aside as so many Indians seem to think I should do.

AIF has offered to help me find a local counselor to talk to. I do appreciate their concern and support, although I think this is something I would rather deal with on my own. And from now on I’ll be taking trains wherever I travel.

Article in The Hindu

The little things

Last night while I was watching Taare Zameen Par, a Hindi movie about a child with dyslexia, it poured outside—nullifying my attempt at drying laundry on our rooftop. But with the rain the temperature cooled dramatically. When I got home, I sat on the rooftop and ate my dinner while watching the lightning bolts shoot across the sky as the storm clouds moved on. It was wonderful! Coming from Portland, I’ve missed the rain.

The movie, part of the ‘Frame of Mind’ film festival sponsored by SCARF Schizophrenia Research Foundation, was also wonderful. It was just the kind of meaningful yet light entertainment I needed at the end of a long week that included working on Saturday! It had the typical Hindi song and dance numbers but the story was about a child struggling with a learning disability and how he overcame it and found acceptance. It was sappy but the child actor was so convincingly good I admittedly shed a tear (or maybe two).

This morning, I lay in bed and listened to the downpour for several hours. It was magical, especially because our original apartment would have totally prevented me from enjoying those kinds of moments! I absolutely love the sound of rain, especially hard rain. And the cool breeze carried the intoxicating scent of rain, which lulled me into such a deep sleep I slept through my alarm. My alarm was set so I could attend be back at the SCARF film festival by 9:30 to get a ticket for Hiding Divya. Lucky for my cross-city by bus travel plans, the rain stopped and I arrived at the film dry. It wasn’t nearly as entertaining as the previous film, but had an equally important message about acceptance of people who are bipolar.

Even though I only had a 1-day weekend, it was enjoyable and productive. I saw two movies, slept through a loud rainstorm, and did some necessary clothes shopping. Tomorrow it’s back to work and it looks like my project is going to get up and running this week…eek! Lots of work to be done for sure!

My rooftop yoga session got cut short this morning because the rain continues…its wonderful!

Budgeting a Night on the Town

(The pasta bar at Aqua at The Park Hotel in Delhi)

During orientation we were wined and dined at some of Delhi’s fanciest restaurants, including a new Japanese restaurant that actually served sushi! Yes, I ate raw fish in India. The food was fabulous, plus there was an open bar and basically we were totally spoiled!

(Team Tamil Nadu)

But as a fellow we are asked to live simply and our stipends encourage a simple yet comfortable lifestyle. We are asked be conscious of our spending and live modestly. Fine! I’m used to living on a budget, I’ve been doing it for a long time. So, I’ve found a local fruit and vegetable stand that is very reasonable, a significant price difference from the fancy air conditioned fruit/vegetable markets. I’ve been cooking in my flat-rice and rasam, oatmeal, tea/coffee, curd and fruit, etc. And I’ve been taking the bus to/from work whenever possible (i.e. when it isn’t pouring). I have not tempted fate with street food yet, but it is something I’d like to incorporate into my life. As a foreigner in India, it is easy to live the high life. To eat at 5 star hotels, shop at American-like supermarkets and hire help to cook and clean. But on our stipends, that lifestyle isn’t possible, especially in a big expensive city like Chennai. Being forced to interact with India on a budget is empowering. It makes me appreciate the splurges even more and makes me realize how unnecessary some of the splurges are—like paying more for food just to shop in an A/C store.

The financial reality of working at NGO in India, is such that even with our “stipends of simplicity”, as fellows we receive more than many of our co-workers earn as salary. Therefore, many of my co-workers are also fellow bus riders and know the system well. However, a few of them seem not to know the system at all and are surprised that I’m getting along so well. On the way back from a field visit one of my co-workers said, “Someday, I’d like to try and take the bus.” And then she texted me to make sure I’d made it home via bus without any problems. Cute! Obviously, not everyone is dependent on the NGO salary. I work with an interesting mix of people from a variety of backgrounds and I’m enjoying all the interactions. Living on a budget allows me the flexibility to mingle at multiple levels and I appreciate that.

(Riding the Bus in Chennai)

Living on a “stipend of simplicity” also encourages innovative planning and finding all the deals in town! So, even fellows can still have a night out, especially when it’s ladies night and drinks are free! Team Chennai enjoyed a few tasty treats at the Taj Hotel this week. Fun times!!

(Team Chennai at the Taj)

RoomS with viewS!

Bay of Bengal, can you see it?

It’s now a fact—we have a flat!
In fact, we have a flat with a view.

We have 6 windows,
In four directions:
North, South, East and West.
Palm trees, laundry lines, and crows.

Up above, our rooftop is an added bonus.
Doing yoga, eating dinner, or washing clothes,
We enjoy the city commotion below.
And if we stand on our tiptoes,
We can even see the ocean!

We have 4 rooms:
2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms,
1 hall and a kitchen.
Ants in the corners,
Mosquitos buzzing,
And a super sweet aunty down below!

Everything we need:
Clean, simple and safe.
It’s our new home,
And it has roomS with viewS.

Our Hall


Our Fabulous Red Fridge


Our Front Balcony and Door